What is PTSD?

Medical marijuana patient Asthon Deroy: 

Last use before writing: 6/27 0200, used treasure island indicia and Jean-Guy Sativa with melatonin. Through smoke & StarBucks medicated Mocha. 

Posted at: 6/27 0600

PTSD is Posttraumatic Stress Disorder. 

If you ask Google what that is you get: 

“A condition of persistent mental and emotional stress occurring as a result of injury or severe psychological shock, typically involving disturbance of sleep and constant vivid recall of the experience, with dulled responses to others and to the outside world.” Google search

If you ask me what it is, however… I will tell you it is. 

  • Consistently having nightmares that make sleep impossible. 
  • Feeling like the world’s sole purpose with you is to torment you. 
  • Losing the ability to believe in love because it only amounts to pain 
  • Struggling to hold a job because you stress yourself out of them
  • Feeling crushed under the pressure of what you feel is your closely approaching doom.

On the telephone doing financial market research in the Baltimore territory. I got called a cockroach by someone on the other end of the phone 6/25. A cockroach, like something exposed to a filthy environment, multiple trauma’s but just won’t die! Even if you crush just a part of one of these pests, it can drag itself around still. However, a cockroach feels no pain!

Maybe I am dirty, maybe I am dragging around a partially crushed carcas. I do feel pain though & instead of letting it kill me. I just try to live in spite of it. 

 

 

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